ANGST!!!

So I figured out why I'm so angsty lately.

David got on facebook the other day and said he was off to book his holidays (emphasis on the plural).

Ok... well... hes coming to see me, yes, but what is the other one?

Apparently he's going to Spain with the kids. Ok, cool.

So, whats the problem you ask?

Why didn't he tell me? I mean, he has been working to make extra money, which is awesome, but I thought it was cause it super expensive to fly him and 3 kids here.

But he does go there every year and really enjoys it.

I guess I just found it weird that he didn't tell me. I mean, he TECHINALY still hasn't told me. I just kind of read it in a comment convo between him and someone.

He tells me about everything else. I guess he didn't think it was that big of a deal.

I mean, it isn't.

Then why am I still thinking about this...

And why am I so angst ridden.

I want back that connection we had while I was there. I've said this before, but going there to see him ruined me for him. I've never been so happy and so loved and so comfortable. And once you leave that, everything else just pails in comparison.

I guess it also doesn't help that I don't have anything to do and he's busy doing a million things a day.

And why can't I relish in the little things right now. Like the great convo we had on thursday morning. Made me so happy.

I guess all this relates back to facebook. And how its dumb. Ugh.

And then I left him a cute facebook wall post and he shoots it down, kinda.

I said how I like that he's back on facebook and such and he said he's going to put the computer away cause its megans present for christmas. Period.... Ok, well, yeah, thats true, but I was trying to be cute.

And the kids did just break up for school so he's probably also busy with them. And will be.

.....

Things are going to be fine. There isn't even anything to worry about.

So why am I feeling this way?

He's great, he's stable, he's wonderful.... It's the distance. It always boils down to the distance. I hate being this far away from him.

But this summer we will be together. I know this. He's coming here.

Just have to keep reminding myself of this.